A couple of gems from there..
Try Not To Read Too Much Into It
Bookstore | Winchester, UK
(A six or seven year old boy comes into the children’s bookstore, his mother trailing behind him.)
Mother: “Go on then! Ask! She won’t know what you’re talking about and then you can stop wasting my time!”
Boy: “Hello!”
Me: “Hello.”
Boy: “I want a book.”
Me: “Well you’re in the right place.”
Boy: “It’s about a boy. Who lives with a caveman. He’s got a funny name beginning with ‘S’.”
Mother: “There. Now you know there’s no such book.”
Me: “That wouldn’t be ‘Stig of the Dump’ would it?”
Boy: *jumping up and down* “Yes yes yes! I told you mummy!”
Mother: “Don’t contradict me in front of my son!” *starts walking her son out of the shop and still talking to me* “You read too many books!”
Short Cake, Tall Order
Bakery | Southlake, TX, USA
Customer: “Excuse me?”
Me: “Good afternoon, ma’am. How can I help you?”
Customer: “I’d like a cake made. Can you make a cake in about 20 minutes?”
Me: “Unfortunately, we have no available decorators at this time. I can certainly take an order for tomorrow morning, however.”
Customer: “No! That’s unacceptable! I refuse to be treated differently just because I’m Jewish!”
Me: “I’m also a Jew, but the issue is that I don’t have the proper training to make a cake for you at this time. I can place an order for you, but can do little more than that.”
Customer: “No, forget it. I refuse to be discriminated like this! I’m leaving!”
Me: “Have a nice day, and happy Hanukkah!”
Customer: “What the h*** is Hanukkah?!”
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